Why I Moved to New York

We’re living in a #goals obsessed generation. Since the rise in social media, erectile and all it’s intricacies; it’s a beautiful thing, but just like anything else that is online, it doesn’t always mean it represents a person’s reality.

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Over recent months, I’ve started to notice the word “goals”, being used on posts of stunning couples you can be both happy and a smidgen envious over; #relationshipgoals. Over the 2.4 family who seem to have the perfect life both online and offline taking selfies in the perfect car, owning the perfect dog, and taking the most perfect holidays; #familygoals. Over the women’s fitness babe page where they truly make you question why you’re eating that white chocolate chip cookie whilst scrolling through their posts and not doing a 5k run instead followed by a round of butt clenches; #fitnessgoals, and the list goes on. The term #goals has been used on Instagram over 25 million times and that’s just one social media platform, but since when did “goals” start being based on other peoples lives and lifestyles online? To aspire to be like someone is one thing, to be inspired is another but to actually set that person’s life as the ultimate goal for how you want yours to be from a filtered snapshot is quite concerning.

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Truth is, we can feel like we know people online through what they choose to share with us, but the truth is, we are only seeing a fragment of their lives.. Knowing of someone, and knowing them personally are two different things. The definition of the term ‘goals’ in the Webster dictionary is “something to do or achieve”, but these ‘internet goals’ are not reflective of reality in its entirety.

Goals is something that should be based on where you’re at in YOUR OWN life. Spending more time with family, moving into that dream career, learning that foreign language, opting for a healthier diet, clearing the overdraft, finally saving enough to put a deposit down for the house purchase. No matter how big or small the goal is, it should be reflective of your journey as an individual. It shouldn’t have anything to do with anyone else. That’s often where comparison can come in, and it’s pretty much a slippery slope downwards from there.

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The only person you should want to be better than is the person you were yesterday.

People generally only post the best parts of their life and being the brand conscious girl that I am, I can admit that I am guilt of this too; we all are to an extent. So by no means am I knocking it, but when goals are based purely off of a social media portrayal that’s unhealthy and dangerous because it can heighten our unrealistic expectations of life and makes us neglect or reject our own realities.

Written by Kibibe Bailey

Edited by Leomie Anderson
We’re living in a #goals obsessed generation. Since the rise in social media, for sale it’s made it a lot easier to not only keep up with the Kardashians, doctor but the busy lives of other people allowing us to have more access meanwhile using their platform to maintain their brand image and further connect with followers. I for one celebrate social media, pilule and all it’s intricacies, it’s a beautiful thing, but just like anything else that is online, it doesn’t always mean it represents a person’s reality. It’s not only social but can be just the surface of a person or company.

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Over recent months, I’ve started to notice the word “goals”, being used on posts such as stunning couples you can be both happy for and a smidgen envious over #relationshipgoals. Over the 2.4 family who seem to have the perfect life both online and offline taking selfies in the perfect car, owning the perfect dog, and taking the most perfect holidays #familygoals. Over the all women’s fitness babe page where they truly make you question why you’re eating that white chocolate chip cookie whilst scrolling through their posts and not doing a 5k run instead followed by a round of butt clenches #fitnessgoals, and the list goes on. The term #goals has been used on Instagram over 25 million times and that’s just one social media platform! But since when did goals start being formulated and set based on other peoples lives? To aspire to be like someone is one thing, to be inspired is another but to actually set that person’s life as the ultimate goal for how you want yours to be from a filtered snapshot is quite concerning.

(GIF)

Truth is, we can feel like we know people online through what they choose to show us, but the truth is, we actually don’t. Knowing about someone, and knowing them personally are two different things. The goals definition in the Webster dictionary is something to do or achieve, but the unfortunate internet goals the majority of the time are something to attain no matter how ridiculously outlandish it may seem.

Goals is something that should be based on where you’re at in YOUR OWN life. Spending more time with family, moving into that dream career, learning that foreign language, opting for a healthier diet, clearing the overdraft, finally saving enough to put a deposit down for the house purchase. No matter how big or small the goal is, it’s your journey. It shouldn’t have anything to do with anyone else. That’s often where comparison can come in, and it’s pretty much a slippery slope downwards from there.

(GIF)

The only person you should want to be better than is the person you were yesterday.

People on the whole, only post the best parts of their life and being the brand conscious girl that I am, I even do it! So by no means am I knocking it, but when goals are based off just a social media portrayal that’s unhealthy and dangerous because it then heightens our unrealistic expectations of life and makes us neglect our own realities.

Remember, their story is not your story, their struggles are not your struggles and their successes are not your successes.

 

Written by: Kibibe Bailey

Instagram: @mskibibebailey

It’s coming up to that time of year again where I’ll be flying back to The States in preparation for the Victoria’s Secret casting so I’ve been feeling very nostalgic. Looking back, visit it’s so crazy to think that in January 2014, cost I was rushing around New York, visiting apartments in between castings looking for a place to rent for a year. It was so stressful and I didn’t have a lot of money but I was determined to move to New York and really give America a try. I knew that in order to progress my career and be successful I would have to leave behind what I knew and where I was comfortable and dive right in.

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I’m a proper London girl, no other city compares in my eyes and New York had always been a hard place for me to take in. But as much as I loved my city, in 2013 I realised that I had gotten too comfortable. I remember speaking to Jourdan Dunn and although she might not remember this conversation, it was one that stuck with me and really helped me in my decision to move. Read the rest over on my personal blog here

Images by @_visionaryshit

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