When Being Wonder Woman Doesn’t Work

The same mantra is constantly farted out by people – “We need more strong female characters.” As far as I can tell, erectile ‘strong female characters’ often end up wearing a catsuit, pharm are blow-dried between fight scenes, and trotted out on Marvel panels at ComicCon.

I don’t think we do need ‘strong female characters’, and I don’t think it’s a particularly feminist sentiment when you look at it a little bit deeper. We need believable female characters, sympathetic female characters, female characters who aren’t what you expect from a particular situation, and female characters who ideally don’t fall into any of the following categories:

  • ‘Bossy’ female CEO who is unmarried, childless and really unhappy about it.
  • Female ‘tough girl’ who’s wearing a leather bra for some reason.
  • Killjoy girlfriend. (I will NEVER forgive whoever cast School of Rock for what they did to Sarah Silverman. NEVER.)
  • Unattractive best friend who will only have a love interest if it’s a joke or an afterthought.
  • ‘Slutty’ girl, sex worker or stripper who is revealed to have a personality, family and friends like it’s a miracle.
  • Mother/wife who sacrifices everything from her career to her dinner and is always doing laundry.

These worn blueprints for female film and TV characters seem to be rolled out by most film directors when they start a new project. There are even some independents that try to break ground on new, controversial topics, yet fail to write any decent female characters into their scripts.

The Bechdel Test is a pretty simple way to see how well-developed and realistic a film’s female characters are. To pass it, a film needs to have two female characters (ideally named characters) who have a conversation about something other than a male character in the film.

I decided to take my five favourite films and see if they pass the Bechdel Test and if this would change my opinion of them. I was mainly quite disappointed.

The Godfather (1972) – FAIL

godfather

This ultimate mafia classic, which makes virtually everyone’s favourite film list, centres around a very Catholic patriarchal family. Already, this is not promising for the Bechdel Test. The main characters are all men who deal universally with other men in business and in life. The only women are Michael Corleone’s abused sister, his fairly passive wife (Hi, Diane Keaton, what are you doing here?), and his mother who appears maybe twice?

It’s set in the 1950s, but that’s not a Get Out of Creating Believable Female Characters Free card. Women may have been perceived and represented differently in a society where abortions were done above newsagents, but that doesn’t mean they didn’t have conversations with each other, stand up for themselves, question things.

I’m still going to be watching The Godfather at least three times a year for the rest of my life, but I really wish Talia Shire and Diane Keaton would just sit and have a chat about something. Bullet proof vests, pasta sauce recipes, whatever.

Scarface (1983) – FAIL

scarface

Brian De Palma directed it, Oliver Stone wrote it, Al Pacino stars in it, and the women are slapped about and generally on a lot of cocaine. (The women who appear in the background are shot largely from the arse down or are probably listed in the credits as ‘Snobby Rich Bitch #4’)

There are three main female characters, and much like The Godfather they’re a mother – sister – wife trifecta. The mother disapproves of her drug-dealing son and doesn’t feature much after she’s made that clear, the sister is the subject of constant patriarchal control and gets to nearly have sex in a toilet cubicle (she can’t have any fun basically), and Michelle Pfeiffer plays a disinterested gangsters’ moll who follows the money. Yes, she is the main inspiration for my hair cut but that doesn’t make her well-rounded.

The only two women who talk to each other are the mother and sister (obvs), and they only ever discuss Al Pacino’s character and how he either is or isn’t a dangerous crime boss. (Spoiler Alert: He is).

You’ve Got Mail (1998) – PASS

youve-got-mail

The late and great Nora Ephron’s You’ve Got Mail is without a doubt the best rom com of all time. I will fight anyone who says different. Following an online, anonymous relationship between two New Yorkers who don’t realise they’re running competing book shops, it passes the Bechdel Test with deep, glossy, flying colours. It’s full of female characters who discuss their work, their 90s understanding of the internet, the future of their book business, and Meg Ryan’s really sweet-sounding dead mum.

There are actually female characters coming in from every angle with things to say, even just little walk-on parts. There are even a few who are written to be deliberately unlikeable, and there’s nothing more believable than someone unlikeable. Snaps for Nora Ephron.

Sunset Boulevard (1950) – FAIL

sunset-boulevard

This is a classic film noir which centres around an isolated former silent film star who’s really pissed that her career is over. When a struggling writer in a lot of debt stumbles into her driveway, she lures him into her tired, old-fashioned mansion in the Hollywood Hills and makes him a kept man. Again, it doesn’t bode well for the ol’ Bechdel Test. She’s a complex figure in her own right though, so this one is almost forgivable. She’s tormented, deluded, jealous, clearly very difficult to get on with, and one of few older female characters to hook up with a younger guy. She may not be relatable, but she’s got enough about her to be believable.

If I’m splitting hairs, it would be nice to see a wealthy female character have a kept man and not be severely mentally ill, but I feel like I should take what I can get with this one.

Clueless (1995) – PASS

clueless

Emmeline Pankhurst, Simone de Beauvoir, Beyoncé, Amy Heckerling’s Clueless – all icons of feminism. A year of my life does not go by without me watching Clueless, and I am overjoyed that it passes the Bechdel Test because I’m not up for my life being a lie right now.

Clueless focuses on wealthy teenage girls in Beverly Hills and their extremely well-dressed friendship group. On the surface, it sounds like any other pointless teen movie, but it actually makes clever menstruation jokes, gives female characters the best lines, contains nods to Jane Austen, and shows the main female character improving herself as a person and doing important stuff with her life before she hooks up with Paul Rudd.

It’s also worth noting that Clueless and You’ve Got Mail, the only two of my favourite films to pass the Bechdel Test, are the only ones on this list directed by women. That’s not a coincidence. Not even a little bit. I don’t even need to drop the mic, I’m just going to put it gently on this table over here.

Written by Helen McCarthy
Grind, order hustle hard, visit web chase perfection, discount stay flawless, be fit & healthy, have the best partner, be a Milf like Fergie, live in the perfect contemporary home, drive the newest car, be a boss…and the list goes on. But, how about when you just want to watch a movie, with no makeup on, on your somewhat worn out sofa, in your favourite ten-year-old tracksuit bottoms whilst eating chocolate covered popcorn, sipping on a refrigerated Diet Coke? Admittedly, it may not be an Instagram Selfie moment to capture on camera, but it’s your own moment of just being. 

The media can often build women up to go and get theirs, ensuring that we don’t rely upon any man to support and provide for us, but when we do, we’re told we are trying to be too much like men and can be made to feel as if we’re not doing a good job taking care of home, and caring for the family if they have one. The kind of pressures that can leave women feeling inadequate meanwhile being split about where to spend their time or energy. The fear of being left behind and not being seen as successful, outweighs the freedom in taking every day as it comes and enjoying life’s journey. If this isn’t enough, the rise in social media platforms comes with cons of being bombarded with thousands more images of apparent female perfection, and women supposedly living the good life whilst the average majority can only watch from a distance as she so effortlessly slays everyday without fail. giphy-2But what does the pressure of trying to be a perfect woman in the 21st Century look like? The obvious external factor would be that it ages us before time, (queue the Neutrogena Rapid Wrinkle Repair cream) but it’s also interesting to note how it affects our health & wellbeing internally too. According to Professor Freeman, Clinical Psychologist at Oxford University & Author of the book, The Stressed Sex, Investigation found women are increasingly expected to function as carer, homemaker, breadwinner and backbone of the family whilst fiercely trying to have a life they’ll love through their own career aspirations or hobbies and look seamlessly flawless doing it, surely Beyonce couldn’t have just woken up like that?! In addition to this, he said the first systematic investigation of national mental health surveys showed psychological disorders and issues with mental health are 20% to 40% more common in women than men due to stress of juggling roles including anything from depression to phobias, the study claims.giphy

There is something beautiful about admitting you can’t do it, not always fighting the feeling and being vulnerable enough to allow yourself to be helped as and when. It’s taken me a while, but I’ve learned you are no less of a woman and you can still be successful. So, with that said, my name is Kibibe. A 28-year-old woman, living in London; who is not perfect, proudly doesn’t have it all together & I will not spend another minute trying to be something I can’t, just to please everyone else but myself. I’m no longer disappointed with what I’m not, where I’m not, and who I’m not, and enjoying the life I’m living today. Please don’t judge me.

Here’s a few helpful tips to help you live life pressure free:

  • Think of 5 things in your life each morning, to ponder on and be thankful for.
  • If looking through another woman’s social media profile makes you feel sad, disappointed, jealous, or discontented…then STOP! Take a moment to think about the people that love and appreciate you, just for being you and keep your day moving.
  • Juggle what you can manage & be adaptable to change.
  • Take off your mask. If you’re struggling, say something to someone you know you can trust not to judge you, but understand you. It will also lighten your load and clear your mind of your worries & stresses.
  • Contrary to E! Entertainment beliefs, Don’t try to Keep Up With The Kardashians. Be focused on living your own life in your own time, and in your own way.

Recommended Read: The Stressed Sex: Uncovering the Truth about Men, Women & Mental Health.

Written by Kibibe Bailey

Instagram @mskibibebailey

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