Have you ever noticed a pattern in your behaviour when trying to accomplish something? You find that you begin to internally harm yourself. This could be in a variety of different ways – doubting your ability, cialis 40mg discrediting your achievements and just being downright negative. This happened to me and I had to take a step back and reflect – why was I being so unkind to myself?
I believe that self-reflection is one of the most important factors in growth. If you don’t reflect, order how can you possibly learn and develop as an individual? When I find that I get stuck in a rut, I remind myself of the following things:
Everything takes time
Achievements rarely happen overnight, it takes hard work, dedication and in many cases sleepless nights. If you expect things to happen quickly, this is where you are making your first mistake. Focusing too much on your end goal will only stifle you. Yes, of course we have to aim for something but pay attention to what you’re doing right now in this very moment. How can you improve? What could you being doing differently? I promise you, if you remain in the present and develop your goal right now, the end achievement will be more than you hoped for.
We all need a break
If you want to lie in bed all day, eat pizza to your hearts consent or just simply take a break, do it. Have you ever found yourself burnt out because you’re constantly trying to do something? I get it, if you’re not being active you feel unproductive but the matter of fact is that we all need to take a break sometimes. From personal experience, when I try to force productivity, I just produce complete and utter rubbish. I recognise that I need to regain my thoughts and simply just relax and revaluate.
I will say this until I’m blue in the face, do not compare yourself to ANYONE. Rather than sitting on your phone all day, scrolling through Instagram or Twitter and looking at what other people are achieving, put your phone down and focus on you! You don’t know what other people are going through and remember that social media platforms only pin point the moments that people want you to see. Stay in your lane and do you because at the end of the day being you is special enough.
Are you finding yourself stifled? Stuck for ideas? Something that helped me in a massive way, was to get inspired. Whether you visit a gallery or museum, a park, go away – whatever it is, find inspiration in something you love and I can guarantee it will help, even if only a little.
Ultimately, there will always be challenges in life but being cruel to yourself will only set you back and stop you from achieving your goals. Be kind to yourself, celebrate your achievements and pat yourself on the back. You’ve come this far and you know what? That’s amazing enough.
In 1998, health Sudanese model Alek Wek openly displayed her view on conforming to the European hair norm. As she got to the end of the runway at the Betsey Johnson show, about it she whipped her straight blonde wig off and chucked it to the onlookers. Despite the backlash Wek may have received after backstage, what is ed it is no doubt her actions screamed ‘Take me as I am.’ After throwing off her wig, Wek has become one of the biggest African models in fashion, gracing the front covers of i-D, Elle and Ebony magazine to name a few. She has also walked for some of the biggest fashion houses in the world including Chanel, Gucci and Givenchy.
Eurocentrism is the concept of focusing on only European history and culture whilst excluding any wider world input. Sometimes in editorials and catwalk shows, hairstyles reference non-European hairstyles but fail to use models of colour or hail the true inspiration. Countless catwalk shows have featured afros, not to mention that recent magazine cover- why in 2016 is black hair still used a source of inspiration in fashion but not treated correctly by it? It is shocking that today, with all the millions of people in the world and the products available, that there is still an ‘errrrrm’ moment surrounding black hairdressing backstage.
So what are the implications of lack of understanding surrounding black hair types? Apart from a little awkwardness, the feelings can run deeper. No girl or woman wants to feel like they receive any type of different treatment in a backstage setting. This was expressed recently by Australian model Duckie Thot who spoke out on her Instagram about her experience of shooting with her natural hair. She details how “upset and embarrassed” she felt when the hairdressing team told her to cornrow her own hair because they were not capable. Yes, the styling process may be handled differently but all models deserve to feel like they can relax because they are in the hands of a professional.
Leomie Anderson is a model and public figure who is well known for sharing her backstage experiences. Her vocal opinions on haircare and styling in the fashion industry began in 2015 when she posted a preview of her upcoming YouTube video to her Instagram. The caption included, “if in 2015 you as a hairdresser don’t know that water makes black hair go curly/frizzy please quit xx”. Any girl with anything other than poker straight hair will be able to relate to this, whether it’s getting caught in the rain or the steam from a hot bath, frizz is the only outcome so why does Leomie still have to point that out in 2016?
One thing we cannot do is stay silent while girls continue to experience this treatment and I feel social media is the frontier in raising awareness. Sharing an opinion or view can go a long way; Leomie did it through vlogs and tweets, Solange did it through lyrics and you can do it too. If you feel like you can change even just one view or opinion, post your words of wisdom or experiences using the hashtag #MyHairIsBae and share your thoughts on the stigma surrounding black hair.
Written by Rebecca Thomas